Quiet City

Barry Bonds

2007-08-10T14:52:00.000-07:00

We came back from camping to find that Barry Bonds had become the home-run king. Funny, the radio waves that came between the mountains forgot to tell us. I was happy not to have known.

2007-07-31T17:25:00.000-07:00

Let children be the peace keepers.

Except for the children with guns.

They are the peace makers.

2007-07-04T09:44:00.000-07:00

Today let's celebrate our independence. Listen to music nobody else want to hear. Eat foods nobody else likes.

Let's build up walls today, that's what the day is for. Let's build walls to keep us seperate from the others. Let's keep our minds and theories free and clear of the minds and theories of people before us and beside us and against us.

Today is the day of our independence. Today is a day to be very alone.

2007-07-02T11:40:00.001-07:00

I remember things today. Like the feeling of floating in the water in the moonlight.

It makes me want to hear that song. Rowboat, row me to the shore.

You know what I mean.

A post!

2007-06-02T12:29:00.000-07:00

It's been a while. But I thought I would post this picture here in case any hadnt seen it cause I think its cute.

For Love

2007-05-10T19:12:00.000-07:00

For AC, the better maker.

We will begin where we left off, no where. The constant negation of the self for the purpose of construction. An alter being set in text and looking back at you wide eyed and bushy tailed.

Remember you didn't like me the first time you meet me. Looking back, I can't say I blame you, though you still invited me to dinner. We all pretended to be the best adults we could be; let us never speak of it again.

We are constantly mining the future for the sake of past lives. We are perhaps burnt out from the process. It's you who never says anything but knows all about it. You let everyone else talk it through while you silently work the wheels. This isn't to say you aren't as much of a pain in the ass as the rest of us.

But still, you make the place and keep quiet about it. You construct your own world out of birds nests and the things your parents couldn't do anything with, old materials that sat outside your house rotting for a hundred years before you cleaned them off and brought them inside. You named them and gave each a place on your mantel. You make the makers nervous the way you constantly watch them and figure their little tricks into the bottom of an orange purse which you may or may not own.

It isn't that I worship you. Just that if nothing else it should be said that if someone can bring nothing to your house save for their own tired ass, I advise them to keep out. I know you know what I'm thinking and that you can spell it, as well, you can also slice the red tomato and you do so for free. You planted them and watered them everyday too.

I've settled now, a different city and you and I and he and them are very far away from one another. The only thing that makes it ok is that we all know what the other is thinking and that we know that there isn't any need to worry about the other. I can't say it makes sense but that's the way it is. If you cut off the bark the tree will die.

Planted self in soil, you made new people with corn from your last dinner party, gave them names and published them as words on ironstone. I know you liked the irony of never having cared. Though between You and I, I know you do care and that it's always bugged you to get passed up. But none of that now, too busy for other things with over six million mouths to feed and me too, from time to time.

There's a good deal about you that recommends the theory of the shape shifting wife. The story of a women who steals off in the night after turning into her animal form to wander around the town and bug the late night junkies and drunks. You sing them lullaby's in you native tongue and put them to bed without fever or worry. Each morning your husband wakes up to find the sheets wet and sandy. Only the sailors know it's you out there on the rocks searching for fishes.

I have absolutely no clue how old you are today, but let it count for something that yours is one of maybe four birthdays I can remember every year. Its something if not much.

2007-04-21T14:06:00.000-07:00

Z-

Are these our Red Sox, bunting for runs? It makes me reconsider my life. Small steps. Small steps do count.

The little things. They matter.

xo
A

Here we go again

2007-04-20T17:57:00.000-07:00

A-

Sox/Yanks at home. A-Rod already has 20 home runs and there are still 10 days left in April. It's new record. I hate to wonder if this will be the year that hitting beats pitching. I hate to say that A-Rod really rather amazing. I think I will call you two this weekend. I miss you four and want to say hi.

other things here are ok and then they are not ok, things are complex and I I'm not always sure what I'm thinking. The situation makes me kinda nervous.

more soon

z

In Bunches

2007-04-14T16:00:00.000-07:00

A-

Schilling's night is over. He allowed only 4 hits to Angels. I like this Schilling much better than the one who talks too much.

Donnelly is toying with them but is one out away from putting this rather enjoyable (though somewhat undramatic) game on ice. Now Manny has the last out in his hand and final score is 8-0. Baseball is here as I'm sure it is there. Baseball is everywhere.

I think its time to trade Coco who is batting a crisp .111. I don't think thats so good. It's a at least time to give him a day off. Whose that other guy we have the one we traded a reliable pitcher for last year when we had "too much pitching." I thought he was suppose to be good, like a starter good. What's he doing today?

Old Roommate from my NYC days is in town and crashing at my place with his lady friend. They are moving here. I happy to have a chance to have more friends out here but I still don't know what the hell to do with my life. I guess I'm going to keep writing and thinking of ways to make money doing something other than filing things. I guess this is what life is all about.

I highly recommend people check out Deerhunter and the Ponys. Saw their show last night it was great. Best show I've seen in a long time.

Anywho I must consider the rest of my day and what I will do with it.

hope all is well.

L
Z

Texas

2007-04-08T19:22:00.000-07:00

A-

Baseball has indeed started. It's welcomed, I don't know that everyone in my life out here understands my fascination with the game but what can I say. It makes me happy and I don't ask anyone else to join me if they aren't interested.

at the moment Pineiro is threating to undue all of Schilling and Papi's work. I'm some glad he isnt our closer. Oh boy things are getting interesting now with the bases load and nobody out.... and This call to the bullpen is being brought to you by Verizon wireless... a win in Texas would be nice seeing as the last two games we totally stunk...

Had a lovely Easter riding bikes with my new friend MTC. She's fun to have around.

what else not much, all of my blog energy goes to the other blog now, but I will try to keep things going..

now its 3-2 good guys... and here comes Micheal Young... wasnt he an All Star last year Z? Yes, yes he was, and for good reason.

Baseball season is indeed here.

l
Z

Openning Day

2007-04-02T13:09:00.000-07:00

Z-

It's here. Openning day. First pitch, ball one. David Ortiz is looking down at me while I write. Three radios are on at once. Baked beans are in the oven. Full count. Openning day. Sam is wearing a Red Sox onesie. Lugo strikes out.

Baseball again. New life. Time to drink beer and work in the garden. A single for Yuke.

And here he is, friends, David Ortiz. 1-800-54-GIANT. I wanted to be writing while he is up. Two strikes. Check swing, he takes it high. Left field, to the gap, it rolls all the way to the wall. Here comes the relay throw and it's too late. Big Pappi's first RBI for hte season and the Red Sox lead it.

Hope you are well.
xo
A

Cheak

2007-03-03T12:32:00.000-08:00

A-

For a second there I couldn't find the cursor... OK everything is a go now. So I haven't put anything down here in a while but have been writing a lot on my myspace blog at work. It's one of the only websites I can access due to some glicht in the web filtering software. It doesn't have a name (though I have considered naming it Super Robot- but I think that might be the name of a comic something or other, that could also be the name of my band). Any so I thought I would say hello in a more straight forward way since that other blog is very not straight forward (I started out with the best intentions but it seems I've only paved the readers way to hell). Anyway...

OK. Reading Rhys again and thinking how very much I love her. Today is a warm/hot sunny day and I am going to go out and try to find some writing on her: Auto/Biography or letters or such, I want to know more. Anyway, Voyage in the Dark is a very good book, makes me think of that perhaps the term multi councousness needs to be invoked: West Indian/English/Class/Female... perhaps Bakhtin's heteroglossia is best, maybe, maybe not. Either way fucking spot on brilliant the whole thing is.

Plans are being formulated in the head about what I'm doing and if I'm going. Suffice to that at the moment though I am doing well and good and content to make some decisions soon- just not right now. Right now is for looking in bookstores and mailing JC his CD's it is also maybe for finding a new belt and reminding myself not to pay lots of money for jeans again cause a month later they have fallen totally apart... It is also for finishing the rest of my coffee, and maybe eating some Spicy Thai kettle Chips that I bought last night when I was a little stoned and they tasted really good. Later today is for hanging out with special new friend who is soft and smells good...

reading the notes on spring training. So far everything looks good, As long as somewhere in the mix we have someone who can close games I think we should do just fine. I think its damn funny to hear Schilling acting the same way Pedro acting in 04 about his contract and renewal and all that... News flash curt, thanks for the ring (really, I mean that) but Pedro Martinez you are not so why don't you can the prima dona act cause you just aren't good enough...

ok off to the post office

L
z

Getting Ready...

2007-02-21T11:10:00.000-08:00

Mr Pesky
Originally uploaded by id10t.

Z-

I'm home now. Ready for spring. Ready for spring training, at least. I hope you made it home as well.

A

Of Rockstars and such

2007-01-28T15:30:00.000-08:00

A-

I finally managed to get into our account again after blogger changed everything around. Annoying.

So anyway, Its Sunday here as it is there, though I imagin you've had more Sunday then I have had. Not much happened this weekend save for hanging out with rockstar again, who now seeing a friend of mine on an informal basis. Its all a little strange to me, but I should say he is a nicer person than I intially thought, he's actually just a nice stonner guy... which I can deal with. Its still very strange. Last night we get stoned and he played his favorite 45s which again was strange for me. My friend having never heard his music, early that day I played some of his stuff for her... again strange. Strange to have a real person to go with an album and group and see that real people made the things Ive been listening to.

Other things non rockstar related.

Teaching is going well though I dont really enjoy teaching computer stuff, since I could care less about Excel and Access but its what they want to learn so I have to teach it. Adults can be lazy is what I learned from grading homework last week. They want to leave early, they dont come to class, they come late, they dont listen when I give directions for homework but overall I like teaching them, its a good first group of students for me I think. The comute to the job is a pain in the ass but overall I'm glad I'm doing it.

I now wonder If im ever going to get out of this city, sometimes its great to be here and other times its just a drag to be here and lonely and although I know lots of people I only have a couple of friends. This is a city though and suppose this is life said city and I suppose its not for me and I just need to move on. It will be good to go when I do, good to leave that bad job which I try not to think about anymore. At least I feel like Im moving toward something instead of still feeling like what I have no clue what the hell im going to do.

ok must do some cleaning
L
z

The Umanator

2007-01-23T17:19:00.000-08:00

Zac,

The Umanator is killing me.

I thought I would never have a reason to say that again but, oddly enough, she is. She is killing me.

Last night J. and I went to the Rhumbline. We had a good time, right up tot he very end. Then I was sitting talking to D.K. when the Umanator interrupted. She said it may sound crazy, but every time she sees me she feels like I have some negative energy toward her. And she doesn't know why. It's not like we even know eachother personally. But she just had to get it off her chest.

I told her I didn't carry any ill will toward her. That all I know about her is that she sang at Isaac Beschevis Singer's birthday party. But I'm thinking of revising my answer.

xo
A

News

2007-01-20T13:37:00.000-08:00

A-

I got my first teaching job this week, teaching ESL and advanced Computer three hours a week at night. Its a start.

more later
z

New Yar

2007-01-07T12:20:00.000-08:00

A-

My attempts to write have been thwarted by sickness as well, my own. Dont have a lot of energy for anything, did everything I could to make through the work week without being able to call in... its not very much fun. Last night tried to go out for Roomies birthday only fail at my attempts, despite a three hour nap I was in no shape for fun.

Now its sunday, breakfast with LT, home reading the paper tired still, dayquill has me all out of sorts, perhaps its a movie day... but the weather is very nice right now, would a lovely day to ride ye old bike, but no.

New Years was fun though nothing much happend, TW, made it to the party with 5mins to go before toast, which was the highlight. Spent the next morning rather hung over but didnt have black eye and felt the better for that. spent the day at the movies watching Volver (I liked it- also thought Children of Men is good too).

ok perhaps a lie down is in order.

though before I go: plans are in the works. More when more is known.

z-

New Year

2007-01-01T19:47:00.000-08:00

Z-

My attempts at keeping my New Year's resolutions are being thwarted by the circumstances of my life. Just as soon as I sat down to write poor Sam (sick Sam) began to cry. It is some time later and I am trying again. This kind of determnation hasn't been seen in this chair for months.

Got your message this morning. It sounded like a good time. We made it through to the new year here and are trying to adjust to it. Abby isn't happy about having to go to bed at a reasonable hour. James and I have set goals that may be a bit out of our range. We'll see.

Sam is crying again. I promise to write here more often. One of my resolutions is to write somewhere every day. Some days are bound to be here.

I hope your day was full of hope and no hangover.

xo
A

Holidays

2006-12-16T15:45:00.000-08:00

A-

finally got internet going in the homestead again. aside from very tense moment regarding drilling through walls and my landlady every went fine. New roomie is moved in house is starting to feel like a home again.

I have a lot of work to do before I fly home friday night... paper to write, class to plan and work to go to (though this is about the only thing I can say that I do anymore in regard to my job). Making holiday cookies tonight. they are yummy.

not much else

I will call when I get home.

see you all soon.

L
z

ps: Sam I look forward to meeting you.

crazy...

2006-11-27T19:09:00.000-08:00

Z-

Glad to see you are making new friends.

Things are a little crazy here. My mom isn't doing so well.

I saw your mom at Market Basket. She looked good.

Saw Ted on the Cape.

Miss you.
A

New Girl

2006-11-23T11:36:00.000-08:00

This is my new Italian girl friend.

Turkey

2006-11-22T06:47:00.000-08:00

A-

yes a new post, a brief one before I go to work. Been a busy couple of weeks, lots of work for class, work is work is work, find a new roommate. Havent slept much in the last few days from working. Found out that i bomb one written assignment for class which isnt the end of the world but isnt good, im not used to being the bad student at these sorts of things.

Life otherwise, my wonderfull, best roommate ever, is moving out, which makes me sad. a new guy buy the name of E should be moving. E is a friend of N who I went to B with now a while back. E and N grew up together in ND, E says he doesnt mind the a cold a apartment in the winter cause of the 20 degress below and all that it can get to in the winter, he also has furniture.

also its better to be friends than lovers...

get happy pills are magic, things are a lot easier these days than they have been in a long time. Its so very nice to not feel like everything is falling apart everytime someone looks at me in a funny way. Things are still things and all things considered they could be better. The better part is me, I didnt want to be crazy pissed off Z anymore. That Z needed to take a pill.

Also the band Beriut is fucking awsome, everyone go buy their CD. Also in my top five this week is Wu Tang Clan 36 Chambers, yesI know its older then the hill but dame if this album doesnt kick my ass. Also Im enjoy Kanye West as well, the song All Falls Down is da bomb. Outkast is also high up there with Ms Jackson moving up the Zac charts with a bullet.

ok off to work

happy eating things day
Z

Pogues 10/11/06 set list

2006-10-13T18:16:00.000-07:00

A-

Here is the set list as best I can remember it for all those who are interested-the order is not 100% right but these where all the songs played. Overall this was one of the best shows Ive ever seen. Some notes on other things I remember two days after the Fact: Shane annouced Spider was getting Married this Sunday... No one understood what he said so Spider reannouced it later in the Show. Also ended up going to show with TW, as new shows were added, so I sold my first ticket and bought two new ones a couple weeks back.

...The song playing when they took the stage was Straight to Hell, which was deliberate as it started to play just as the lights went down. A nice touch. Also makes me think Im not far off on my musings of the nature of the pogues/shane and a sort of post neocolonialism.

Streams of Whiskey
If I should Fall From Grace with God
Broad Majestic Shannon (the song for which I called you for)
Syonara
Pair of Brown Eyes (Shane screwed up the intro and made them stop the song and start over again)
Insturmental (dont know the name/sorry!)
Sunny Side fo the Street
White City
Tuesday Morning
Dirty Old Town
Bottle of Smoke
Body of an American
Turkish Song of the Damned
Thousands are sailing (sung by Phil Chevron)
Boys from the Country Hell
Old Main Drag
Sickbed of Cuchulainn

Encore #1
Rainy Night in Soho
Irish Rover
Sally Maclennane

Encore #2
Fairy Tale Of New York (with unknown Female Vocal who did a good job...RIP Kristy)
Fiesta (with Spider banging his head against some type of brass plate, Shane had one too but choose not to use his head but his mic instead)

Overall Shane was strong, but started out pretty rough, fucked up a few things in the begining of the show but ended the whole thing in grand fashion.

Ok meeting TW and friend in a little for Clap your Hands Say Yeah show tonight. Its been a busy week.

love
Z

3rd

2006-10-01T21:58:00.000-07:00

A-

Ugg. This is a tough one to swallow. Oh well. Ive got more than enough to keep me busy this fall. It's going to be interesting to see just how well the Sox can be rebuilt this winter, my xmass wish list includes things like: Tori Hunter (though I dont agree that Coco is a no go and this years Renteria, I think he's worth investing some time in), a bullpen (note, we seem to have to go through this every year), A number five hitter, Catching reinforcement, a way to keep Trot (sorta like the way the Yanks have held on the Bernie Williams- he cant be an everyday player anymore but he is Trot, my respect for him runs deep). there's too much to think of right, this year just stunk in everyway that didnt have to do with David Ortiz.

good night
z

Bad Luck

2006-09-27T21:33:00.000-07:00

A-

A long list of "should be's". 1# on the list is studying (present progressive). Course starts next week am I have no clue why I signed up for it. The money is all gone, debt has come home to rost. I'm tired of moving, the problem with moving to another country is the same problem I have with living in the Bay Area, I will have to go with me. I'm really fucking sick of I. How is it that people seem to always be able to tell that I am not a happy camper? Is this why I couldnt find another job, another girl another any-fucking-thing. Im not sure if my mental condition is getting worse or if people really dont like me. I dont want to teach people english, however, I dont want to do anything anymore. I'm thinking about going on ritalin, basically im sick of being smart and nothing ever getting done. I have free time and nothing gets done. Im tired of being a bitter fuck up at everything I do. Sometimes i think about how i might have been able to go to grad school this year if I hadnt flipped out and fucked everything up. "Now its over im dead and I havent done anything that i want or I'm still alive and theres nothing I want to do."

whoops almost 10 now, better get to bed, must be fresh and on top of things for my exceiting career in health care.

I should not publish this, I should just go to bed, but whatever maybe some day when im famous these entries can be used by my biographier.

Lo Mejor

2006-09-21T20:21:00.000-07:00

In terms of news

2006-09-20T18:17:00.000-07:00

A-

Couple things:

Off to see Mission of Burma Tonight, opening is Kristian Hersh and her 50ft Wave. It's an evening of east coast punk rock. Truth be told Im really tired and would rather the sleep, but I bought the ticket and I do really want to see them so sleep be damed!

More Pogues shows were annouced so I sold my other ticket (the one I paid $100 for) and bought two, for one of the new dates, for TW and Myself, for the more resonable price of $75 a pop.

The big bit is this: While you may have heard some rumors it is now more or less official that I will be getting my ESL teaching certification this fall in hopes of teaching aboard sometime in the next year. While the question of how I am going to pay for the whole thing is still a bit uncertain I have received some Fin aid for the padres (handy they are, love them I must) and things look good to go. I dont know if this ammounts to any type of solution, but it does give me something to work for and a way out of the hell I have created for myself here in the Bay Area. To be honest this feels like part great notion, part failure, but maybe this is just becuase I am tired right now. It is at the very least one more steep toward acknowledging that I fucked something up somewhere along the way and now I must pay.

anyway

hope all is well back east
love to the family
z

Wee lad

2006-08-28T22:25:00.000-07:00

A-

Thanks for the pics, it makes me happy to get a peek at the wee lad.

Sam you shouldnt feel any pressure about the sox, your sister had a much better rotation to work with then you do. Sorry kido, will get um' next year. Besides she blew it on the election hard core, so you got that one over her.

A. dont go gettin all up on my shit just cause I may or may not being giving you children blogguilt complexes about things they dont have any power over. If your not going to raise them catholic someone has to do something, a guiltless childhood is hardly worth the money.

night night
z

Sam, Day One

2006-08-28T08:28:00.000-07:00

firstday
Originally uploaded by Mandy K.

Z-

I'm sorry this has taken me so long to put up. The kid's grown a bit since this picture, taken when he was just a few hours old. I'll put something more current up soon, I promise. Maybe you shouldn't believe me.

I'm sorry Sam hasn't done to the Red Sox what Abby did. I'm afraid all sports glory from his birth went directly tot he US team in the World Basketball thingy. Oops.

All my love,
A

Mothafuckinsonofabitchin'...

2006-08-19T10:27:00.000-07:00

A-

Sorry for the language but holly shit does this team suck! WTF am I crazy or should a deep pocket team be able to at least find two pitchers who can make it past the fourth inning.... in terms of offense, it doesnt matter how many fucking runs they score cause an over worked dead horse of a bullpen is still going to give up another 10 fucking runs over the next five innnings.

Sure am glad we gave up Ramirez and Sanchez for Josh "the home run king" Beckett... Hey Josh, just a word of advise from someone who never even played baseball: Throwing a baseball really fast and right down the middle isnt the way you get AL pitchers to strike out dip shit... that just means they get hit further. But im sure you've figured that out by now huh, mr. leader in home runs surrenderd. You Bring it Josh, your the fucking man!

Oh well I guess i dont have to watch at lot of baseball this year... Its too bad though we arnt a NL Team then we would just have to wait till the world series to see how bad we sucked.

Z

Welcome Samuel!

2006-08-09T21:22:00.000-07:00

A-

Sure your busy and wont get a chance to read this any time soon but since its too late to call here now so I thought I would just write to say Woopee!!!!

Welcome Samuel, so very good to hear you have decided to join us. I have no doubt your sister will fill you on the important things like your letters, the revolution, Baseball, and rock music... thats what sisters are for. One word on your parents, they are Crazy... I mean like totally, but they are also they best in the buisness and further more two of the finest people this world has every saw fit to produce. I so very glad they are reproducing.

I look forward to meeting you in person around Christmass.

talk soon
All My Love
z

PS: I am at this point claiming all rights on physic connection to your children A, seeing as I know always when they are comming and in what form they will take.

PPS: I hope your giving birth has some effect on the Sox, as it did last time, cause it this point it looks like we need some magic.

advice

2006-08-02T22:01:00.000-07:00

A-

Question to which I might already know the answere:

it seems that the Pogues are comming to town, my town that is, west coast tour was annouced a while back. Tickets are now sold out. question being this, $130 worth it? do I know the answere, even if im the only one for who it is worth is it still worth it to go alone? I would have paid more to fly home to see them but now there here... its a shame really, that new bike I was planning to buy would have been really cool.

other things to consider, Clap Your Hands tickets are also going on sale soon...as well as others. but the Pogues are the Pogues are the Pogues to me and I dare say not many other bands will ever be as close to my heart.

damn ye Shane, damn ye!

z

Funny Game this Baseball

2006-07-27T19:26:00.000-07:00

A-

Went to both night games this week. Both of which I very much enjoyed, though I cant say the Oakland Fan had the same experience. Game two wasnt pretty in terms fan relations and I was a little worried I might have to run for my life at one point over an issues regarding Balls and Strikes- fortunatly their was no shortage of Fenway Faithfulls to get each others back.

Here is my choice of Cutest Couple of the Series:

Our boys...

2006-07-25T13:27:00.000-07:00

Z-

Jane had one a week ago Thursday. A little (not so little- 9 lbs. 13 oz.) girl named Thea. Mine's next, I hope... this nine-months-pregnant thing is kicking my ass.

So our boys are in your neck of the woods and I fell asleep right after A Gonz's homerun. That's what it's like here. But tonight is another game, and another chance to stay up. It's only fair to note that Abigail woke up at 4 in the morning yesterday so I really was very very very tired.

Not much else new here. Abby knows Big Papi by sight, and mostly knows Coco Crisp. She won't know Schilling because we tore up the picture that came in the Globe. Damned republican.

I hope your power stays on. Greg's brother visited witha friend who called flavor ice otter pops. I hope you have flavor ice.

love,
Amanda

Hot

2006-07-23T17:19:00.000-07:00

A-

It's even hot here right now, lots of not moving very fast due to the heat.

Are there any new babies in Gloucester?

Friend's son was born this past Sunday. Yeah for the babies! Now we have pleanty of food for the tigers!

meow
z

Feliz Cumpleanos

2006-07-12T21:20:00.000-07:00

A-

Want to wish a Happy Birthday to one Pablo Neruda who is a 102 years young today. To celebrate the day I went to a reading at a little art house down the street called the Red Poppy, reminded me of the olde Art Space back home. Jack Hirschman read, pretty good. Made me think of the day I went to Isla Negra to see Pablo, buried in the back yard and his house now a museum- this isn't the way to remember anyone me thinks, but there was still an ocean there and I had brought a pretty girl with me and so perhaps that was enough. It should stand as much to say, this is only the second reading I've been to in the last two years, perhaps this is testament enough to my affection para la obra de PN.

Cumpleanos Feliz

Cumpleanos Feliz

Cumpleanos Cumpleanos

Cumpleanos Feliz

Buenos Noche mis vidas

z

Still playing....

2006-07-09T15:39:00.000-07:00

Zac-

The city is ablaze. Strike that, the city is drowning in fumes from traffic caused by a parade celebrating Italy's win and the bridge going up twice without the light changing from red in between. We finally watched a match with Ben.

It is the thirteenth inning. Will this game ever end? Long night last night after a long day yesterday. I've been having Braxton-Hicks contractions, especially when I walk around a bit. The house is almost ready for a baby, if it ever will be.

I should be cleaning while listening to the game. I am not.

A

Super Sports Sunday

2006-07-09T12:05:00.000-07:00

A-

we've got the Bosox in chitown Schilling vrs. Contreras, shcill is currently winning the pitch count war in the third. As if this wasnt enough to float the old boat I also have the world cup game going after a I had the brilliant idea to buy an antenna, who will win France or Italy. Im routing for Italy.

...theres something gross about sitting around watching TV on a gorgess day, but fuck if I have anything to do.

Back

2006-07-01T11:50:00.000-07:00

A-

Made it back without the plane crashing. Readjusting to not being on vacation anymore. Need to unpack but dont want to, need to make some plans. Need to buy some new cloths with birthday money or perhaps buy a new bike. Back again to the life of Z in San Francisco. People are saying I should move back east, I cant say I disagree but I'm not sure I'm ready. Mom says Portland is a great city, but I know she and I have different Portlands in mind. Maybe

Sleepy this morning, coffee is helping but still dont want to take much on. Need to buy a new pair of sunglasses, going outside without them on gives me a headache in CA. Sun is brighter, stronger, more willfull, will not tire.

no more USA no more Argentina, sad, but life, like Germany and Brasil, goes on.

Baseball makes me happy, I like me team a lot right now, even with the loss last night. 12 in row, and new record for no errors is too cool for school me thinks. Now if we just had one more pitcher. Got to watch the whole Pedro game on the flight, which was about the best way to spend five hours on a plane that I can think of.

ok must begin day...right after I cheak my email again.

z

Human(beings)

2006-06-15T20:38:00.000-07:00

A-

Two years in California, Ive learned this much this far:

"we are not Human(actions)

we are not Human(results)

we are Human(beings)"

Perhaps ill tell you all the story behind this little bit of wisdom when I get to town next.

Very tired, Fighting the urge to sleep becuase its only 8:30 on thursday. Two more days of work before vacation begins again, praise be! At the moment im so fucking sick of job and life and uber califorina freaks I'm about ready to jump down a hole and not come back. someone please to put me to bed and help me fill it would nice, not in the cards it would seem. So instead i will blow all my money on bikes or dream of running away back to mexico or Spain this time. whose got 200 quid they can lend me for a flight across the ocean? The worst part of being in a state is this, am I just fucked, or is this just a fucking magic spell some fucker has cast on me? maybe its my attitude, thats what they say.

fuckers

what else: Party at Mothers, Saturday 06/24/06, Ill phone with more details when I get in. I might wind up with 2 extra Sox tickets for the Friday before, their my birthday present. was to go with Mother and Brother, but it does not seem that will happen as so. Soooo, perhaps consider the possibility of Sox vrs Phils...yes I know its fiesta, and whats more the giant suxing sound you hear is indeed comming from Fenway. Neat

oh well

soon,
meow meow meow
z

Tonights Game

2006-06-06T19:02:00.000-07:00

A-

this one hurt.

z

New time

2006-06-04T20:14:00.000-07:00

A-

two weeks

I promise,

I miss you three very much. I want to be home in South Carolina. You don't know trouble till it's trouble.

I hate the big decisions

still so, I should do what I should

soon my darlings

z

Quiet Nights

2006-06-02T19:03:00.000-07:00

Z-
Listening to the Sox, ninth inning in Detroit. For the first time in a long time I am able to sit at the computer and not be overwhelmed by the mess around me and the mess in my head. The Red Sox just won.

Spring is giving way to summer here. Abby and I get iced coffee and sit at the State Fish Pier watching the boats come and go.

When are you coming home?

A

foxes

2006-05-17T22:04:00.000-07:00

A-

I wrote last night too, but Im feeling giving right now. Truth be told Im not doing something I should be doing. But I will never tell what.

Read KH's blog for the first time in a while just now and it made me happy. I would much rather be playing music. I would much rather be writing some winny blog then what I should be doing.

I would rather be kissing a pretty girl maybe one will come a along in a bit. Its been a while without one around and I think want this all fine and good but really...all this time alone to think just makes me edgy.

I have to drink one Tecate a day. there are too many in the fridge and no room for food. I dont know how they got there. I dont know.

I think im going to stay here a little longer. So now that Ive confessed this I'm going to try to stop complaning about it so much.

tommorow is pay day, which is good cause it cost a lot to throw your own birthday.

night night
z

Missed

2006-05-17T09:21:00.000-07:00

Z-

I missed the day in spite of myself. Abby and I had what turned out to be the worst day of travel I have ever had. At the end of it I was wasted and in Seatlle. The Seattle part is good, the wasted wasn't. I hope your day was better than mine. Details later, if Abby allows.

In any case we send our love.

Amanda

twenty eight

2006-05-16T23:35:00.000-07:00

A-

this getting older shit is in fact bullshit. Now I'm all thinking I'm an idiot for staying up past 10pm...

anyway its my day, I feel ok about it, Perhaps theres more I should be thankfull for, less I should worry over, and more I should do.

right now the doing is saying I should go to bed,

hope all is well in seattle, give the fish a kiss for me.

night night
z

ps: new blog is here: http://fetterdunfetterd.blogspot.com/
pps: maybe Abby and I should start one as well so I can colaborate with each member of cook family.

Thanks

2006-05-13T11:52:00.000-07:00

Z-

Thank you for birthday wishes. I am having a hard time not being a hermit these days. Having a hard time keeping in touch. I spend my time knitting and cleaning and listening to baseball. I don't know if I could get anything else done if I tried.

Abby and I are going to Seattle on Tuesday. I am looking forward to it. Babs says it is sunny there. Here we have standing pools of water across 128. I guess it si our turn for the rain. But does it have to come during a home stand?

A

A Day

2006-05-10T06:56:00.000-07:00

A-

Happy Birthday

Love

Z

Some thoughts

2006-05-06T18:30:00.000-07:00

A-

Cat Power was a big disappointment, I hate to say it but I got a little tired of Chan's bizarre behavior (and it was really bizarre) -wander on and off the strange while the band played. She seemed to be under the weather and was coughing a lot so her voice wasn't as strong as it was the last time I saw her. All songs from the new album, no oldies. The band she has is pretty good, but I really wasn't interested in them playing without Chan, which they did a lot of. It was weird. Overall, I think TW said it best after the show when that it made us feel old, I kinda felt like something I used to be really into had made the move to middle age mediocrity.

game is going well, guys are starting to hit, its a nice change.

meow for now
z

Back in the saddle...

2006-05-03T12:21:00.000-07:00

Z-

The past week has been all about being sick in bed and without a working internet connection. I am so done with that. Today I can sit up wiothout hating the world and I am able to get online in less than half an hour.

Life is good.

Did you send this rain home with James?

I have managed to falla sleep during the ninth inning of most baseball games I have listened to this past week.

Got any plans for Kentucky Derby Day?

A

Breaking News:

2006-05-01T19:22:00.000-07:00

A-

This just in:

He's still your Papi!

MVPAPI!!!!!

love
Z

Phone on the Way

2006-04-29T11:40:00.000-07:00

A-

Mailed out cell phone today:

here are some more pictures:

Back

2006-04-26T21:09:00.000-07:00

A-

Didnt leave home but now I'm back. The only difference is there is more poetry in my house than there was before. It's not a bad thing.

Tired tonight, spent most of the night being very grumpy, it seems to have worn off, maybe it was the chocolate I had. One year review at work today, Overall they like me I guess. In your own words "I still quit". Question is, where to next young sir? need the pay cheaks, getting grumper by the day over the whole thing. Trying to keep the faith, more writing: new blog comming soon(?), might try to see if i can push some other stuff out there...why not?

Notified Albany this week that I would not be attending in the Fall. I apperciate their acceptance but it dont mean much if they cant offer me funding. back to the drawing board.

Tonights game didnt help my gump... Only one run...WTF.. more talk that Clemans is coming to town...I dont know if I believe it. would it be good if it were true? We do need another starter, 3 number 1's??? Coco needs to get back in the game... what do we do with Willy Mo? I know what to do with Willi Harris...Bring Back Stern.

the song Look at Miss Ohio makes me happy. I'll do right someday too.

pictures are of Big Sur and such:

Vacation

2006-04-20T00:16:00.000-07:00

A-

Thanks for sending your husband along, its been quite nice to have him here. Lots of walking, eating, drinking, buying, looking, talking. the Sun is shining these days, it has not done this in a while. Thursday we are heading to Big Sur with TW.

Here is a picture of him in his natural habitat:

wish you and A were here as well

L

z

California Dreamin'

2006-04-17T14:00:00.000-07:00

Z-

By now my husband has probably made his way to your front doorstep. Take good care of him, show him a good time. I wish we were with you.

A

TinyLittle Fingers

2006-04-12T20:45:00.000-07:00

A-

I found out today that a women I knew somewhat briefly when I first moved out here, but lost touch with a while back, had died. From the one account I have she apparently took her own life. Her name was Shelley, and though I cant say that I knew her very well I am a little blown away by this news. She was a bartender at a place in Oakland called Bigum's Silver Lion, a short walk from my old home. Though I went there a bunch, it stands out now as the bar I went to the night the Bosox won the world series. It was Shelley who poured me the first of many rounds on the house that night and helped me keep the jukebox playing the Pogues (each time the word whiskey was shouted in a song she would pour us both another round). For the short while that I knew her, She never called me by my name but by the nickname I earned that night: Boston. A name I was proud to wear: "Boston, how the hell are ya kid." She also used to say that I was her future x-husband. However this isn't what it seems, and we never went past friendship. Unfortunates the last time I saw her was not her best night, and a friend and I were somewhat scared off by the whole thing. I've often wondered if this was fair of us and even more so now think that perhaps we could have been better friends. Im sorry Shelley if we judged to harshly.

There isn't very much I can say or really want to say other than what I remember about her, It is not my place and I have too many mix feelings about everything. I am left with only the feeling that I am very thankfully for my friends and family whom I know would be there if I were ever in trouble, and that they have my promise of the same.

Goodbye Shelley, god speed.

z

2006 BoSox

2006-04-09T12:03:00.000-07:00

A-

I would just like to say that though it is early, everything thus far seems extermely promising. I am starting to fall in love with this team. What is not to love, every time I tune in someone is making a great play, getting the hit we need. The Pitching is great so far.... Maybe this is just me but I would rather see a game won by a run then 10. Wake is on the hill and doing a fine job, Pap is the bomb, Schill is still an asshole but im more forgiving when gives up one run over seven, I even liked clement on his first outing. Beckett first game was great as well. The other day as Crisp lined one into center for the uptenth time it occurred to me "Johnny Damon who?". Nixon will always have my respect, Papi and Manny will turn on soon enough to unleash the reign of terror over AL pitchers....

but yes it is early

z

motherfucker

2006-04-04T22:32:00.000-07:00

A-

Im in a bad mood, Im not going to try not to be. It has been raining for 25 out the last 30 days. The best part is it is suppose to rain for two more fucking weeks straight. I fucking hate the this weather, who ever thinks CA is nice weather is a motherfucking dip shit. No Summer, no winter just fucking shite every fucking day...why be cold when you never have to be warm again...come to the fucking Bay Area and blow your fucking brains out...

Bad dreams about AK, fighting, waking up late at night to things slamming when I am the only one in the apartment. No Money means no money for me means no future no If I believe dat fool I tell he was fucking asshole
fuck the troops too
and fuck the presfuture no future. Job is going to kill me and I dont blame it.

I even smoked some pot tonight just try to mellow the fuck out, maybe it would help me giggle...I normaly dont like to endulge becuase it makes me so uncomfortable around other people but on my own its fine every now and then..tonight im just pissed off and stoned...

fuckmotherfuckingpieceofshitecuntbolloxwhorefacefuckedassshitefuckeddogboymobydinkcoxsuckingsonof awhorelovingrepublican

go to bed to get up again to go to fucking job and I dont even want to shave anymore becuase I cant figure out the what the fucking point to anything is anymore.

time to go nighty nighty

z

Take me out to the ball game...

2006-04-03T16:44:00.000-07:00

Z-

Not a bad start, huh? I got most of the garden planted while listening to the game. I'm tired now but happy to have peas and carrots and beats and green planted. And one win under the belt.

A

radio silence

2006-04-01T11:03:00.000-08:00

A-

no, quite alright, I wasn't mad about the picture...It made me laugh, he's my pops, what can one do....

While I am not ruling it out because I really want to go, At this point it does not seem likely I will be going to U of A. The head of Anthro Dept made it pretty clear they had no intention of ever giving me funding. Not sure how to take this, to be honest IM a little surprised by this and am going to contact one of the professors to make sure. I just don't think it wise to pay for 6-7 years of school with loans and a small bit of aid. We'll see.

unfortunately I may have to give notice at work sooner rather than latter, while IM going to try to hang on a little longer there is only so much unpleasantness one can put up with. On Friday administration revoked all internet access on work computers... not the only reason, my boss seems to have tacked me to his shit list. If I don't respond to emails in a timely fashion this is why.

listening to Spring training game in Philly...Baseball is back and I am very happy for the distraction. I like our chances this year, not sure about Beckett, but Crisp seems all that was advertised, nice infield defense which makes me happy.... I dont know if I believe we have lost any power hitting...both Manny and Papi are here and hitting (though Boston dirtdogs are saying that Manny is retiring??? is this a joke, I dont know..hes in the lineup today soooooo). Willy Mo Pena should do nicely with all that pop and what not... Pitching is the million dollar question though...Not sure I believe Schilling, I for one would have traded Clement ahead of Arroyo... what can you do...Wake will be Wake, Wells can retire any time he wants in my opinion.

ok more soon,
z

All Apologies...

2006-03-30T10:24:00.000-08:00

Z-

Sorry about that. But what are the chances of me going to the Rhumb Line 5 months pregnant, your father being there and me having my camera?

It is starting to feel like spring here. I am thinking of planting peas this weekend.

A

Tiny dancer

2006-03-29T20:21:00.000-08:00

A-

Your some funny shit for putting that picture of my pops up (Everyone who doesn't know the picture below is in fact the man I know as father). I think you've more than got me back for the late night call, I promise i'll never call that late again. I'm glad to hear he is excited I might move back east... He didn't sound too fucking excited when I spoke to him... oh well the endless dance of father and son continues.

waiting on money, keep look at letter, ink might dissapear, might be a mistake, maybe its a bad school and they take everyone who applies. None of this is the case and I know it, but fuck all who sends a tiny letter for acceptence, what am I suppose to do now save sit here and wonder what happens next, do I start contacting profressors to talk shop? do I call the Fin Aid office say "look fuckers give me all your fucking money or ill........" nothing to do save wait till things are a little more clear.

okie dokie
sleepy and must yield
z

Just My Imagination...

2006-03-28T06:10:00.000-08:00

Just My Imagination...
Originally uploaded by Mandy K.

Z-

So Jane and I go to Jalapeno's and the Rhumb Line last night. Who should sit down next to us but one Mr. Dave Martin. After some hilarity we reintroduced ourselves.

It was hard to say who was more excited that you are coming closer to home. I didn't know your great-grandfather ran a resturant in New York!

Congratulations and all my love.

Amanda

p.s.- there is a Mountain Goats song with 128 in it, but it is in West Texas.

p.p.s.- No worry about the late call. It is next to impossible for me to get a good night's sleep anyway. Just be happy I didn't call you when I woke up in the morning to tell you about the Mountain Goats song.
-*/

2006-03-27T20:09:00.000-08:00

A-

Im really sorry about the late night call...

wont happen again

sorry
z

Albany

2006-03-25T15:25:00.000-08:00

A-

News came earlier than I had thought..............Apparently the State University of New York Albany has taken the following action regarding my application for admission to the PhD Program in Anthropology: I have been accepted for admittance starting in the fall of 2006.

Does anyone know what happens now?

It doesnt seem that their going to give me any money, but we shall see what happens.

many thanks to eveyone who had to listen to me complain and moan and had to read my letters and repeatedly tell me to stop being such an ass hat and finish the whole thing.

zac is happy

meow for now
z

Should Be...

2006-03-24T06:40:00.001-08:00

Zac,

I should be paying bills right now. As you can tell, I am not paying bills right now. It is Friday. Friday is my day to open all the mail I have been avoiding and to pay bills.

Yesterday it was warm enough to walk to Jalapeno's for a light dinner. Soup and squid. Lemonaid on the rocks with salt for me.

This morning the mood is slow and I don't think it will get better. Abigail threw her cheerios and cocoa. I can't say I didn't feel the same.

I wish you had been at our show instead of yours. I think it was more fun and as crappy as Avalon is it was a small place and the eurotrash was kept to a minimum. I am definitely paying attention to where a show is from here on out.

Well, I shouldn't avoid life any longer. Or what I mean is that I should have some coffee and see if that helps.

xo,
A

2006-03-24T06:40:00.000-08:00

Fox in the Snow

2006-03-22T18:21:00.000-08:00

A-

***Ok I've added to this a little so...if you care what they played...songs came back to me as I feel asleep last night... now back on my head.****

so im not going to do the whole set list cuase I havent got a fucking clue what the names of some of the very dumb songs they played were but heres what I remember and liked...

Stars of Track and Field
Another Sunny day
Funny Little Frog (wrong order)
White Colar boy (again wrong order)
Suki in the Graveyard (said to be about a real life San Franciscan girl, written while in San Francisco- according to Stuart...this might explain why the song sucks so much)
If your feeling sinister (ahhhhh relief)
Piazza, New York Catcher (dedicated to San Francisco- a song im not all that familar with but is quite nice...the Giants, Willie Mays statue, the Tenderlion- all places I frequent)
Electronic Renaissance (at this point the entire show decended into eurotrash disco night, which was something close to toture to me and seemed to last for ever)
If your feeling sinister
Fox in the Snow( if anything could rescue me from hell it is this song)
Get me away from here im dying
she's Losing It (yummy)
Dog on Wheels
encore:
I'm a Cuckoo
Judy and the Dream of Horses

ok thats what I remember them playing and what I dont want to remember (im sure there was something else but its all slipped now)...Most of this show was great, however the Venue was just awfull (a large convention center room with about 15,000 thousand people, most of whom were under 21). All said and done I remember why I dont like large rock shows these days, the band seemed to not be thrilled about the venue either...Stuart made comments to the effect of "sorry about this place, just pretend were in a small venue...")

I'll post other songs if they come to me, but I dont think it was that much different from the Boston Show.

Meow for now
z

Dog on Wheels

2006-03-20T12:15:00.000-08:00

A-

your back now I trust, good to hear from you the other night. Today I called in Sick to work, no I'm not, I just couldnt go... This is bad but what can I do. Maybe someone will lend me 200 quid for a flight across the ocean, maybe things will look better there cuase they couldnt be much worse, than tears and a curse...

no more Arroyo, Willy Mo Pena cant grow corn rows but he Can become a very good ball player...I think this is a pretty good trade to be honest. Arroyo is in the same club as Mark Belhorn...they never have to buy drinks in the bar I'm at but really an upgrade is an upgrade.

oh on Baseball I just wanted to: VIVA CUBA! I love, and I mean Love that America has been knocked out with all its bloated players...sorry Tek (your all heart but its true)...I havent watched a game of this World Cup Baseball stuff, but I will watch tonight...A resounding fuck you to the Yanks (and I dont mean just new york):Im defecting, fuck this file room bull shit I'm going where people read, eat, and play baseball- I dont care if Castro makes us wear our underwear on the outside and sing Guatanamara all day long...Fuck Bush and his children of the corn

maybe Ill go ride around on city buses today for a hobby of sorts, it might help me calm down

anyway
z

Body of an American

2006-03-15T20:30:00.000-08:00

A-

Many thanks for the call. Nice to be thought of during such a song. The message came through clear enough to tell me what I was missing... oh well one more reason to hate the California... fucking shit hole, this place, and the people who inhabit it.

not feeling well, perhaps I should go to bed

Hope the show was everything im sure it would have been

L
z

ho hum

2006-03-11T16:41:00.000-08:00

A-

I should get ready to go soon, have to get dressed up to go to some work party... something of a favor for a friend...

Ive got the heads today as the result of a fun night out with Ted though Im sorry to say his night didnt end as smoothly as mine did...dont pass out on the Bart if its the last train home is the moral of that story. things dont make much sense today, hard to do much of anything really...

should get ready, cant wear a dirty black hoody...

I may have that extra ticket still..though I dont think the show is sold out, whatever.

ok off i go
z

Set List

2006-03-10T13:52:00.000-08:00

Z-

The set list from B&S.

I was sitting at the Gibson's kitchen table this afternoon. A friend who lives a few blocks away from you might want a ticket to the show in out there. I gave her your email.

I hope all's well.

A

Apology

2006-03-08T09:38:00.000-08:00

Z-

Sorry about that. I'm not convinced that we are not still in denial about it. We don't talk about that season.

I recommend returning it as quickly as possible and rewatching a previous season. Season 3. That'll work. Then tell yourself they did a poor poor job of wrapping it up.

A

No more Jeff

2006-03-07T21:52:00.000-08:00

A-

I'm upset with both of you..no not you Abby (this goes back to before you)...

why the hell didnt you tell me Jeff wasnt in the 4th season of Coupling???? what you thought it would be better if I just found out, comming home from another shite day of work to watch some new episodes... and no Jeff??? Thanks! and when were you going to tell me you saw my girlfriend making out with some other guy...when were you going to tell me I dont have a girlfriend and that I should leave that those two people alone .....

some friends

z

Oscar

2006-03-06T19:47:00.000-08:00

A-

I think that Ive seen one more movie than you this year, and I didnt even watch the oscars. Though John Stewart is funny, much more so than Billy Cyrstal.

Not much to be reported here either, save that I'm starting to come to the conclusion that I've lost my sex appeal...I doubt having some stupid B+S tickets is going to help that much. The last girl to flirt with me was 18, for a moment I considered it, this got me in trouble with my lesbian friends. Trying to save my money to run away. my Loans are now my own, this makes fleeing harder, fuck america and its loans and atom bombs, America should pay me to tolerate such shit..and no I dont want to grow up..

what else is there: Im not feeling well again...i really need sometime off from work, but dont have any PTO and no where to go, fun. I want to be warm. its cold and wet here and the only fun thing Ive do is ride my bike, I watch lots of netflicks too. Rented couplings and rolled around laughing....I dont care if it is friends with english accents, that show is funny.

Baseball is back! yea! more big papi, and some guy named Coco...no more comboy up...strange all that come and gone. oh well, had to happen someday

maybe ill go to bed early tonight
L
z

Abby Standing, Standing Stone.

2006-03-05T19:47:00.000-08:00

Abby Standing, Standing Stone.
Originally uploaded by Mandy K.

Z-
We're back. We're still tired, one week later.

Belle and Sebastion was a good show. Even if you don't like the new album it is nice to see so many guitars lined up. Plus, you might get a date out of it. Ask JC about "Set-List Girl."

(Note: this is a tease. The person being teased may not think so. It is, in fact, a tease. After all, teasing is funny...)

Not much new to report here. I got a new cork board. Mayne it will help me pay bills on time. It isn't spring. I'm watching the Oscars. I think I've only seen one movie all year.

All my love,
A

Meow now

2006-02-19T14:52:00.000-08:00

A-

thanks for the lovely picture. Your off in Ireland now, which is a good place to be...I would dearly love a pint and a stroll along the Liffy, someday again. I would like to get away for a while or for longer.

Dinner tonight with BW before he moves back East this week. Sorry to see him go though I cant say I blame him, The Bay Area didnt really throw out the red carpet to him. What can one do.

right now its a quiet sunday, listening to "Spooked" for the second time around in a row, quite good really, its growing on me. As are some of the songs on the new B&S album, all things in time. perhaps I will do my taxes today and send them off so that I can use the money to either pay some bills or if I decided to be bad, buy the bike frame I've been lusting after.

someday I would like to have a fuzzy creature to come home to, a kitten or dog- hard to do this right now with little stability on the home front and being semi commited to city living. Maybe I should move to the Country, what do people do for work in the Country? Do they have file rooms in the Country? Am I ready for the Country?

ok meow for now
z

Candy Heart

2006-02-14T06:20:00.000-08:00

Candy Heart
Originally uploaded by Mandy K.

Z-
Hugs and kisses for you.

A and A

For the price of a cup of tea...

2006-02-13T18:10:00.000-08:00

Z-

I think of you could see Abby dance to the new B+S you might feel differently, at least on some of the songs. Heard the new Cat Power yet?

I finally bit the bullet and went to Boston today to pay the ton of money it takes to replace a passport quickly after one moves and has a baby and realizes that she must have put the old one in a safe place because it certainly isn't in a logical one. So now I am starting to get excited about going to Ireland on Saturday.

My plants hate me too. I think I went overboard trying to bring plants inside over the winter. Half of my geraniums have done well and half are dying the death they were meant to die months ago. I think I am going to put a tray of rocks underneath them and water that as well as watering the plants. The evaporation gives plants some additional moisture without drowning them. Of course, Abby will eat the rocks. Is it worth it?

I bet you'll find someone to go to the show. There's still a good amount of time. We're convinced we'll be the oldest people at the show here (James, Greg, Melanie and I). That's okay. I'll be old and pregnant and probably completely unhip. At least then I won't be tragically hip.

Glad to hear of the application.

A

The Life Pursuit by...

2006-02-12T21:03:00.000-08:00

A-

A somewhat messy weekend finds me here around 9 on sunday feeling raggedly, grumpy and listening to RHP, I thought to write. I think I need a vacation or something, sleep.

nothing much new: Though I thought I should say that I did get out one application to Albany last week...not much, but I suspose its something, we shall see.

the new Belle and Sabation is not good, in fact I would even go so far to say that it is the worst one to date. Im starting to wish that I had not bought four tickets to their show since its seems no one either wants to go or cant for some reason.... guess i miss judged this one...

I think my house plants are unhappy with me, their giving me leary looks as if to suggest that ive fallen out of love with them.. Ill water them before I go to bed this should help things, I hope

night night
z

Online

2006-02-01T20:43:00.000-08:00

A-

My my space and friendster profiles have become something like a night at the Rumbline in which every person I went to highschool with has found and wants to be my friend again. oh well... I guess I can deal with people wanting to be my friend.

what else> here is my Horoscope from Free Will Astrology (which I here addmit to reading every wednesday without fail and have for about 7 years now)

"Do you have a forbidden fantasy? Is there some adventure you wish you could let yourself have, but you lack the money or spunk to attempt it? Have you been nursing an impossible dream that is no closer to fulfillment now than it was when you first conjured it up years ago? If so, Taurus, the time has come to resolve your relationship with it. Either renounce it and forget it forever, or else take a bold, practical step toward making it come true. P.S. You have more courage than you realize."

I think this is the sign I need to run away.....

A friend of mine fell in a fountain last weekend- that was funny, sometimes I feel like my life has become some chapter in a book ive read: see Ginger Man

reading some Henry Miller's Tropic of Capricorn right now for shits and giggles...Donleavy is better I must say....most of the time I cant seperate the Miller who writes like a surely teenager (Bangs once said about Richard Hell: "He understands the questions but none of the answeres"- I think the same applys to Miller- not that far of a leap given Hells adherence to the Beats)from the miller who gets why going to work everyday is the most soul sucking experience ever- one moment he has a great tangent on alienation in New York the next he spoils everything with some arrogant line about him being special and removed from the rest of humanity and slaping his bitch around and yada yada ...I will say ive never been a huge beat fan anyway...On the Road did not light any fire under my arse....Ginsberg and Weiners but then I dont read poetry anymore soo oh well, anyway Ill take Donleavy high low art to Miller's any day of the week.

nighty night
z

Cindy-Lou Who Sells Out

2006-01-25T17:39:00.000-08:00

Cindy-Lou Who Sells Out
Originally uploaded by Mandy K.

Zac,
The boys have gone home. As soon as they left I fell apart, headache and exhaustion . I feel like I should be able to get so much done now that I only have one baby here, but I know that isn't true. I'm writing to you. That's something. Isn't it?

love,
A

Gone

2006-01-24T21:09:00.000-08:00

A-

lets see:

this:

Im not going to come home in March...I would dearly love to see the Pogues but I will to miss this one.

Instead:

I am going to come for about a week (maybe two) during the Last bit of June...which means bona fiesta..I think (its the last full weekend of June right?) so, no fucking poetry or art or whatfuckingever and I wont get sick...

Feeling surly tonight and decided to erase my online peronal account, I dont want to meet people through a computer anymore, not that I met to many anyway cuase I was so weirded out by the whole fucking rigamarole anyway- I would like to meet new people and all but whatfuckingever im sick of meeting people who really love their fucking jobs...fuck them too...I dont think I'm naturally this bitter of a person, its actually not very much fun when I feel this way..I dont like it, anyway

off we go again
hydeho
z

ps: Is "Crying of Lot 49" sometype of fucking joke? I thought Don Dolittle was piece of shit for writing his brand of no nothing smarmy bullshit- but wow! Pynchon must be the daddy of them all.

pps: here is a picture of a sea lion that I took this weekend

Only Thursday

2006-01-19T11:58:00.000-08:00

Z,

It is Thursday. Only Thursday. I have had Caleb and Elijah here since Tuesday. They will be here until Wednesday. Two nights down. Six to go.

Needless to say, I am tired. The boys are good but there are still two more children in our house. Two kids who don't have the habit of taking naps and who don't really go to bed at a reasonable time. I tried the first night to get them to bed early but the crying that resulted woke up Abigail and nobody got to bed. Now we have a new routine: I put the movie Elf on (note- I HATE the movie Elf) and the boys fall asleep in the living room. Then I carry them upstairs. I think it makes them miss their parents when they go to bed, so by falling asleep watching Elf avoids the whole issue. I don't think this is a battle I want to fight this week and I guess it doesn't matter anyway.

I don't know if you should move. I'm not going to say that it will make everything better. It won't. But I don't think San Francisco is really the place for you. A new place could make a difference, if only in that you have another new start. I like the idea of you in Seattle. I don't think the rain is going to be a problem but I wouldn't move until after the rainy season. It just doesn't seem like a good introduction to living in a place.

There is no reason to stay in a place you don't like. You have the freedom to move if you want. It won't always be that way. It is better to end up somewhere you like before you don't have that freedom.

I've got to go wipe someone's ass. And you thought your job was crappy!

Amanda

your not him

2006-01-15T13:26:00.000-08:00

A-

Sunday, no job tomorrow, feeling lethargic and decided that I wanted a hamburger. The burger has not help raise my energy level. Feeling sad and worried about things as I am accustomed to doing these days, I should just go out for a bike ride, Perhaps to Trader Joes and buy some yummy snacks. Maybe in a little bit.

Saw Kristin Hersh last night, very good show at the Swedish American Music Hall- played Snow Cat and Hate My Way for me. She tells good stories, her story about riding on a bus when she was younger sitting next to an old women who said she never leaves the house (told this to KH on a bus). When KH asked, "what bothers you about going outside?" The old women looked around shyish like and then whispered..."well look what they did to Jesus". Which is a dam good fucking point if you ask me.

(I hope KH doesnt mind me telling her story- but since you can now download the new 50 foot Wave EP for free at throwingmusic.com it would seem to me she isnt one to insist on her sole right to her intellectual labor- at least in terms of capital. Just in case KH or her lawyers stop by ye old Quiet City let it by known neither I nor A have ever made a dime off this blog..... Though I havent given up hope of getting a call from Harper Lee some day.

:later today: decided to edit spelling mistakes and just say that I didnt think Broken Flowers was as bad as some seem to think it is. Some good sad awkward moments. Had a bit of a strange moment in Trader Joes when I realized that there was nothing I wanted to buy (what are Americans for if not to buy?), normally not the case. Got a couple of frozen things and the salad dressing I like, looked to see if they had a homeopathic remedy for being depressed- but I couldnt remember what such a thing might be or look like or even work or..they didnt have it anyway. rode bike home, finished reading Johnny Cash Bio (pretty good),talked to KT on the phone and told him I wanted to get the fuck out of city, out of area, he sounded concerned and tried to be reassuring about the Bay being a good place to be and that I need to have a plan and that things aren't going to get better if I just move- I suspect he's right and Im nuts, but thats the thing about being nuts- I dont have to be rational about anything I dont want to be rational about, Im mean look what they did to Jesus.

I think I'm going to stay up late reading cuase thats what I used to do when I was young and I didnt know what else to do or how to make things better-

what else,
not much- have tickets to see Cat Power in Feb. should be good- Maybe Sun Kill Moon but I really hate modest mouse next week. maybe I need to improve my attitude-

more soon,
l
Z

and then some

2006-01-08T21:08:00.000-08:00

A-

Black eye is healing well, just looks like Im tired, which I am. I told everyone at work that it was just a silly accident and not truth...I figure it was a lie for the best...im not sure they believe me though...I dont care though.

Still not sure what to do with my life and Im sick of asking myself the same questions- Seattle sounds good but only as a new back drop to what I can only imagin will be the same old shit- just with more rain. Im scared of the rain, Im scared it will make me crazy never seeing the sun and that things will get worse if I cant find a job. Why are these things so hard to come by? Friends write me encouraging words to get me to make the move there, and I would like to say fuck it and go, but I dont think that I can do it just yet. But please dont make me go back to that hospital...please no more of it..really...grad school is up shit creek without fucking pray at this point as well and the whole thing makes me sick to my stomach like I dont belong anywhere anymore and im not who I thought i was and fuckitall im fucking sick of fucking everything up.

bikes are fun everyone should get one and ride it round and round and round- you can take them to the bars with your friends, out in the night or day, through traffic, up and down hillls and back and forth, they do not support wars and it puts the fun right where it should be as in between your legs...go get one right now or soon hereafter...

more over and in about
L
z

2006-01-02T20:02:00.000-08:00

Z-

Ouch.

Why don't you come home for the Boston show on the 15th? You could take my ticket to that show...

The New Year came in with a little less of a bang here. It was a good time and I am still exhausted. My New Year's resolutions are already falling away. Oh well.

Take care of yourself,
A

Ol Paddy

2006-01-02T11:21:00.000-08:00

A-

had an interesting New Years, and I'm starting off 2006 with a black eye, why? becuase I dont know when to shut up. It's no biggy though more funny than not now, but my adviced to everyone is not to yell "fuck you" at a bunch of macho guys walking down the street.... so everyone should make fun of me for being an asshole.

Im looking for a Pogues ticket- they are currently going for very high prices- around $300 and up for the March 17 show- which is out of my range considering the flight and all- however the flight will be cheaper... then there is the where will I stay- I suppose I can hit up old Bard friends- most of who live in NYC now-

anyway happy new year
z

2005

2005-12-30T18:04:00.000-08:00

A-

not the greatest year on the record books I must say, what with all the natural and personal revolts and such. Here's to a better year to come.

Dont have any big plans for news years yet- maybe something will come together tommorow- no biggie- Its suppose to rain all weekend- its suppose to rain for the next two months- not really my favorite thing about the Bay Area.

I got your presents the other day and must say many many thanks- the pictures of A are great and the CD and T shirts make me all happy and warm. Yes I have good friends, I like them a lot. I hope that I everything I sent you there made it- hope you like.

Perhaps Ill give a call tommorow night to wish all well,

L
z

Starting....

2005-12-28T08:30:00.000-08:00

Z-

I'm starting to get a handle on things here after the holiday. Tomorrow is trash and recycling and I am trying to get everything out of the house in preperation for New Year's Eve. I wish you were going to be here.

The house is cold right now. We went for breakfast and didn't turn the heat up until we got home. My hands are cold and I think I should be moving more than I am to keep warm.

What are you up to?

A

Father Christmas

2005-12-24T10:46:00.000-08:00

"Have yourself a merry Christmas
Have yourself a good time
but remember the kids who got nothing
as your drinking down your wine"

Merry Christmas all-

I miss you I hope to see you soon in the next year

A quick thought

2005-12-20T21:01:00.000-08:00

Dear Johnny Damon:

Go fuck yourself you miserable bastard

merry fucking xmass you fucktard
and good luck with the clone army next year

best
z

Here's to Bill:

2005-12-15T18:41:00.000-08:00

Thanks for the great moments Billy- Sorry to see you go

some things

2005-12-08T19:01:00.000-08:00

A-

Bombed the GRE- nuff said about this. Not sure what to do now- as my scores were so bad theres almost no point in applying- I could still do Albany since there deadline is March 15, which would give me time to the take test again. But gone is dream of Austin for the moment..and of getting away from my job back to something else.

better news:

Ben and i Saw Freakwater on Tuesday night. Best show I've seen in a long time. Made me want to start a country band again. Talked with Katherine after the show shortly- thanked her for getting a boy from Boston into country- she asked me when I moved out to Ca. I tried not to be a fan- but I think I failed.

All things considered I think were having a pretty good hot stove season- If we can just find a suitor for Clement and Wells- though we can no doubt not afford to trade them both. Read today that Tejada wants to be traded- I'm filing this under "best wet dream ever" Ortiz hitting in front of Tejada, throw in todays aquisistion of Marte from the Braves for Renteria and what you have is "what the hell is Manny being Manny". that is a team right there- with a starting rotation of Pap, Schill, Becket (god willing he is healthy-MRIs say otherwise) and who else- Arroyo- Maybe we could Ervin Santana from the Angles for Manny (im still in wet dream mode).

I've more or less finished the bike i was building: Im including a picture of it here becuase I am a big old dork

hope all is well
z

thought to write again

2005-11-16T22:09:00.000-08:00

A-

The last time I wrote, Theo was still GM. The last time I wrote there was still baseball. Now there is Grad school applications and bikes. The GRE suck, Fixed gear is the cool. thats dl right now with me. Online dating isnt so much fun either- but whats a lonely boy to do. I cant help but make fun of myself for the shit storm called my life. whatever. Dont suppose anyone stops by here anymore.

try not to be sad, cause everyone wants me to get happy, but not if I dont feel it, yet. no new music: save this advice The Clientele stink. its more of a statement but what the hey, but it should save everyone a bunch of trouble- I took one for the team and went to see them last weekend at Bottom of the Hill- I mean yikes thats a lame fucking band. This is comming from someone who loves the English and their Music too.

anyway what else is new:

Building a Bike is expensive: who would have thought....aquired an early 80's Fugi frame striped of everything and am currently converting it to fixed gear. It's fun but distracting.

Seattle was wonderfull: someday I'll tell everyone a funny story about my first night there....bad ideas make for good tellin me thinks.

what of it: im comming home for thanksgiving- -I gave in and decided it would do me some good.

Still not very taken with SF- trying to branch out and make the most of it cuase at this point im ready to pack it in and leave come spring- big old waste of fucking time moving out here has been-not sure where the next stop will be but how i fare with aceptence and funding at the graduate level will be a factor- if no on either or both counts I might head north- but then south is nice and warm- not sure about east. Just out of CA and lame ass fucking Bay Area- oh whatever

so to bed
z

One more Time

2005-09-29T19:33:00.000-07:00

I've decided to name my first born child and any animals I might come to house:

David Ortiz

he is my babies daddy sowhose your fuckin Papi, Arod?

Clement...

2005-09-18T12:03:00.000-07:00

Z-

No arguument from me on Clement. I have turned the radio off. Maybe when I hear about the game later I will be happily surpised.

We're all coming don with colds here. Inspired by Tad C. I am making a chicken soup inspired by the caldo tlalpeno you get at Jalapeno's.

Too bad to hear about 7 runs. I gave up at 4.

A

Mat

2005-09-18T11:14:00.000-07:00

A-

Matt Clement sucks, nuff said. what useless piece of shit- 7 runs scored off him by the second inning. He's been so so all year and apperently even thats to much to ask when it matters. Say goodbye to the post season.

z

Bang

2005-09-15T21:46:00.000-07:00

A-

your picture was about the only thing that made me smile tonight. Go Bangs! Team Bangs all the way.

kinda rough couple of days here- AK and I have split- sorry im not going into more detail on this blog than to say that it happen- I dont want to have one of those blogs. suffice to say I'm down about that.

and then I mean OMfuckingG could our picting get any fucking worse. Tonight was a perfect example of how pitching wins games agianst teams like ours, The A's have the best ERA of any team in the majors but the one of the worst BA's and lo they one against the team the leads AL in runs scored buy has the worst ERA. Go fuckin figure. As of tonight we are 1 1/2 games ahead of the yankees for the AL East. Hold on to your cha chas cuase every game from here on out for the next 16 or so days is going to be a big game.

writing- im not going to go into more detail that that is so too, This is also not one of those blogs either.

what type of blog is this: the kind in which we could actually just send emails back and forth to each other and no one would miss us, were just so dam pleased with how smart we are we all thought you might want to get in on the action.

hold on to your tits
z

Got bangs?

2005-09-14T19:10:00.000-07:00

Gotbangs
Originally uploaded by Mandy K.

Z-

I'm not usually into taking my own photo at arm's length but I thought you might like to know that I got bangs.

Pretty exciting, huh?

It's a shame about Gabe. But Ortiz continues to be the man.

A