So tired.

Z-

Long day yyesterday, starting with morning sickness amd cleaning house. Shopped with my sister a bit (got a new dress for Saturday night). Walked with her and the boys to Fiesta, where she ran the 5k. To Jalapeno's for margharitas, none for me. Walked back to E's and spent some time sitting on her floor. Got home and slept.

Waking up lately with such pain in my back, it usually goes away. My belly has a mind of its own. Really. Busy days like yesterday I have no time to just sit still and feel the baby kick. I freak myself out about it until I get the chance to be still. Last night Adnama (what I told G I would name the baby should it be a girl... think Nomar) cooperated and got me both on the left and right side.

We miss you at fiesta. We miss me at fiesta. The sailors aren't as good looking this year. The outfits are just as ridiculous. My new maternity halter top made my outfit fiesta-appropriate.

I don't know what to say about the whole failure thing. Except that I don't think you've failed and I feel fine saying fuck you to whomever says you have. How long have you been there? Knowing hardly anybody? Don't let it get you down. I'm sure you could get some crud job if you had too, but until you have too, I'd keep looking for something better. Don't spend too much time waiting around, it doesn't do any good. I recommend lots of walks in different places. That's cheap. Reading is cheap.

I expect my computer to crash any minute now, so I am going to stop here before I lose this post. I don't think I could handle that.

More later.

love
a